Giving my all

I've been thinking all day about understanding the meaning of what it is to give the effort and take your time for someone else. I first of all have to say, it's very time consuming and draining at times. What I have found out though, and it's something that's become more apparent recently is the fact that it is gratifying. That is when you truly know your heart and soul are working properly.

Rightfully so through the years we are raised in a lot of different ways to have high self esteem and positive emotions towards ourselves. For some, they take that teaching and just apply it to the necessary phases for life, for others they take it literally and make it become something they eat, drink, and breathe. The art of selfishness, something that I have felt for very long.

As I've grown up, I've ran away from home, disobeyed a lot of orders, and did a lot of things that skewered my view of what growing up should be. I expected it to be too easy, and in those lessons and trials is where I have found moments of clarity. I hope in the coming days to meditate a little more, and start being in tune with my thoughts as they go haywire at times. My heart is heavy but strong, and my mind in pure wonderment at everything in life.

For the past two years I have learned what it is to love and to appreciate that love for better and for worse. It has been a test of every fiber of my being, learning to give your all to someone else just for the simple gratification coming from their happiness. Learning that feeling has been a truly interesting journey that I hope to continue, as I grow up.

Valentine's day for me is a reminder of what I didn't have when I was by myself, and I feel for those who are alone cause I've been there, but my advice would be simple as it is easy to give advice from a position of power. A day will come when it is your time, I just realized I had to wait, and then when you find someone who is worth it, you give them yourself as you would hope they do for you. Peace, love, and happiness.